您可以not exists用来选择尚未与某个用户合作的所有用户
select * from
db_users dbu
where not exists (
select 1 from db_likes dbl
where dbl.relation in ('dislike','like','maybe') -- not sure if this is necessary
and dbl.user = $oUser->id
and dbl.partner = dbu.id
)
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